Do you think it is worthwhile to reflect on the events of your life and the meaning
behind them?
If your answer is yes, you are in agreement with the research which states that making
sense of our lives can free us from the nonproductive patterns of the past.
Dan Siegel, a researcher in the neurobiology of relationships, writes that when we take time
to understand ourselves we develop a capacity for "Mind sight." He states that mindsight depends
upon the ability of the mind to create mental symbols of the mind itself. This ability allows
us to focus on the thoughts, feelings, perceptions, sensations, memories, beliefs, attitudes, and
intentions of others as well as of ourselves."
One area where reflection is most helpful is in understanding our early life experiences,
so as to create a story of our life for ourselves. Contrary to what many believe, early experiences
do not have to determine our fate. When you are able to make sense of your early experiences, you
are more likely to be able forgive yourself and others and are less likely to recreate old
patterns. Without self-understanding, science has shown that "history will repeat itself."
Siegel's research in neuroscience suggests that "the brain continues to develop both new
connections and perhaps new neurons throughout a persons life. The connections among neurons
determine how mental processes are created. Experience shapes neural connections in the brain.
Therefore, experience shapes the mind. Interpersonal relationships and self-reflection
foster the ongoing growth of the mind."
Being mindful helps us to focus on more than just the surface of our experience. We can intentionally choose to grow, intentionally choose to appreciate others, and therefore intentionally allow new neural networks to develop in the brain. When we do so our living becomes more joyful and filled with meaning.
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